Bringing long lost VHS movies back from the past!
Episodes
Tuesday Aug 02, 2022
Tuesday Aug 02, 2022
It's summer and the Bandits are off to earn a degree at South Beach Academy where the bustiest and longest-butted babes go to get an education on beach etiquette. Join the main character who know one cares about and has never heard of, Corey Feldman in an add-libbed supporting role and total pervert Grandpa Munster in this sex comedy from the mid 90's where volleyball is the game of choice against Italian mobster, James Hong. Get ready for babes, bush and lots of filler in South Beach Academy!
Friday Jul 01, 2022
Friday Jul 01, 2022
With the Boston Celtics just in the NBA Finals this season there's been no better time for the VHS Bandits to pop in a wicked good movie all about their hometown team in CELTIC PRIDE.
Dan Aykroyd and Daniel Stern kidnap Ohio Jazz player Damon Wayans so the Celtics will finally win the NBA Championship.
Put in this headphones, strap on some duct tape handcuffs, put on that Celtics jersey and pop in Celtic Pride!
Wednesday May 04, 2022
Wednesday May 04, 2022
The Bandits are BACK to kickbox your noggin right off your shoulders!
Left for dead and seeking revenge, a kickboxing champion dresses like a ninja and cleans up the street of punks and goons for some free subs. It's a gory ass kicking lost gem from the 90s, PSYCHO KICKBOXER: THE DARK ANGEL rereleased on modern VHS by Camp Motion Pictures.
Monday Feb 21, 2022
Monday Feb 21, 2022
It might be a cold, snowy winter outside but the slopes are sizzlin' hot and it's time to brush up on some ski lessons with SKI SCHOOL 2!
Dean Cameron and his gang of ski mountain misfits are at it again to help save the mountain and Dean's girl from some clean-cut dweeb.
Dust off the VCR and get ready to rewind down this triple black diamond with plenty of party hats and sex comedy hot-dogging abound.
Monday Jan 24, 2022
Monday Jan 24, 2022
Et tu, Full Moon Features?
In the Italian Alps or likely Californian woods, some people fight against their friend who's possessed by the evil spirit of a Roman Gladiator who goes by Tyranus and also Demonicus.
Can stirring a cauldron of Halloween store rubber body parts bring the evil gladiator's rubber Halloween store corpse back to life and become the Evil Ash from Army of Darkness lookalike he always dreamed to be?
Put in those earbuds, dust off the VCR and strap on a skull helmet because it's going to a a bumpy ride when the VHS Bandits journey through DEMONICUS!
Thursday Jan 13, 2022
Thursday Jan 13, 2022
Remember the murderous Ricky from the last movie? Wearing a Santa outfit, raising his eyebrows, saying one-liners, shooting a guy taking out the garbage and always ready to PUNISH? This time HE'S BACK...but it's Bill Moseley with his brain in a plastic dome and only saying one word. Silent Night Deadly Night 3 begs the question: Is It Live or Is It Memorex??
Have pleasant nightmares this holiday season with the VHS Bandits! Grab some eggnog and pop in the tape!
Tuesday Nov 23, 2021
Tuesday Nov 23, 2021
A stripper and a non-stripper team up to avoid being prosecuted for a murder they didn't commit. Their solution? Commit a bunch more crimes in order to prove their innocence, including kidnapping a police officer. What could go wrong?
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Monday Nov 08, 2021
Monday Nov 08, 2021
Lorenzo Lamas and Matthias Hues in one movie? Is it even possible? Can one film even contain such power? Bounty Tracker can! When Lorenzo Lamas goes on a mission of revenge hunting down Matthias Hues someone's gonna have to lay off the ice brah, or get iced! Grab a bucket of buttered-nails and a quart of motor oil to wash it down because we're watching Bounty Tracker!
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Monday Oct 18, 2021
Monday Oct 18, 2021
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Happy Halloween, Bandits! Back from the grave comes a terrifying Tales from the Crypt and or Dark Side rip-off! Camp Motion Pictures has resurrected this 8mm anthology and brought it to VHS. A pool that eats people? Check. A haunted house? Check. A teacher being attacked by a mummy for some reason. Check. A sleazy director doing lines of coke with hookers? CHECK!!! Grab your sack of Halloween candy and trade for the good stuff because we're watching The Basement!
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Monday Oct 04, 2021
Monday Oct 04, 2021
Viewer beware you're in for an old geezer with spiders in his hair! We kick off the Halloween season with VHS Bandits Super Fan, Chase AKA @TheDVDCreep, to go trick or treating in 1996 while saying "Carly Beth" 400 times.
The tables have turned and this time one of the bullies from the first Haunted Mask wears another haunted mask. This one comes with an AARP card, a can of V8 tomato juice and complains about young people and how he used to walk to school for miles in a blizzard. Only a porcelain symbol of love can free him from the evil powers of halloween.
Wednesday Sep 22, 2021
Wednesday Sep 22, 2021
We're back to school with a '90s hip hop switcharoo in Kid n' Play's Class Act! Kid's a Steve Urkel geekazoid who needs to pass Phys Ed to get into a prestigious University. Play's a street tough ladies man who needs to pass anything to stay out of jail. They switch places and next thing you know a school bully and drug dealers are out for them. Plus toss MTV MANIAC Pauly Shore in there breifly!
This one's sure to earn you extra credit this semester. Now dust off that VCR and start studying so you'll become a Class Act!
Monday Sep 06, 2021
Monday Sep 06, 2021
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It's back to school season and that doesn't just go for humans... This year the Ghoulies join the freshman class in Ghoulies 3: Ghoulies go to college! Kevin McCarthy of UHF fame takes this movie to another level using the Ghoulies to elevate a prank war in order to expel his most hated students. Oh, and also the Ghoulies talk in this one. Pull up a toilet seat and let's pop in the tape!
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Monday Aug 23, 2021
Monday Aug 23, 2021
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This week we bring you everybody's favorite Full Moon clown: Killjoy! He shows up in a magic ice cream truck a year after you summon him from a doll because a homeless guy says so. Then he kills some people and we get some party hats. What more could you ask for?!
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Monday Aug 09, 2021
Monday Aug 09, 2021
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What's that in the sky? Is it a bird? A plane? No! It's a jump cut avoiding any special effects to a big fat alien in a polyester suit who's here to ear people! And he's not here to eat just anyone he's only after Italians from NYC! And one guy from New Jersey. This movie is a slap stick of beef jerky you're tasteless buds won't be able to resist! Grab a fudgey the fish ice cream cake and let's pop in the tape!
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Monday Jul 19, 2021
Monday Jul 19, 2021
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The VHS Bandits summer vacation continues with Bikini Carwash Company! Need to make a little extra cash this summer to pay for your uncle's medical underwear bills? Why not get naked and wash some cars in 1990's Los Angeles?! District Attorney and pervert flasher be damned. Pop in the tape and pop up your big fat bone daddies for Bikini Carwash Company!
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Monday Jul 05, 2021
Monday Jul 05, 2021
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Happy Independence Day, bandits! What better way to celebrate our freedom than with Hulk Hogan kicking commie ass and committing to a sham marriage?! Watch as the Hulkster tears down structures with his bare hands, hang glides for no reason, and uncovers secret buried treasure with his super-mega-boat! Pop in the tape, brother!
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Tuesday Jun 22, 2021
Tuesday Jun 22, 2021
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Monday Jun 07, 2021
Monday Jun 07, 2021
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You've seen her bedtime stories, you've seen her get attacked by Jack Nicholson, now see Shelley Duvall's magnum opus: Mother Goose Rock N Rhyme! In what is possibly the most 90's looking kid's movie from the 90s Gordon Goose and Bo Peep are on a mission to save Mother Goose. They encounter every creep in Rhyme Land, including Woody Harrelson as a dead beat stogie smoking lamb. Will they be able to save Rhymeland? Tune in to find out!
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Monday May 24, 2021
Monday May 24, 2021
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A staple movie in the Dane Train household in the early 90's we watched one of the big 3 kid's movie Bike-Sploieitation films, The Dirt Bike Kid. In order to save a shitty hot dog stand from an evil banker Ralphie, from a Christmas Story, must use his magic flying dirt bike to... do stuff. If this movie teaches us anything it is that a boy's best friend is his bike. So hop on and take a ride with us to watch The Dirt Bike Kid!
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Monday May 10, 2021
Monday May 10, 2021
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In a world where the Seinfeld theme is the only song and where high school chicks machete their way to justice, you will find Brutal Fury! A two thousand-year-old order of high schoolers out for vengeance via a Karate Store somehow get mixed up with an undercover cop doing a drug bust while her not undercover cop husband investigates murders with Winnebago Man... That's about the best we can do to summarize this week's film Brutal Fury!
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Monday Apr 19, 2021
Monday Apr 19, 2021
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Not since Attack of the Killer Tomatoes has a movie been so profound, so poignant, or so produce driven. This week on the show we bring you the modern masterpiece of cinema Return of the Killer Tomatoes! This film stars George Clooney, in his best role to date, as second banana to some other guy. Together with the help of a hot chick and a sentient fuzzball they have to stop John Aston and his tomato-human chimeras from taking over the world. Let's pop in the tape!
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Monday Apr 05, 2021
Monday Apr 05, 2021
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Happy Easter! If you thought those hidden Easter eggs were hard to find then try finding your mom after she's drank some invisible juice! And then have her adopt a new brother for you but then get the brother kidnapped by Mickey Monkee who's trying to murder him for his inherited wealth and then get stuck in a haunted house where the only way out is to put your mom's invisible butthole in his face... We watched Invisible Mom 2. Enjoy!
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Monday Mar 15, 2021
Monday Mar 15, 2021
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When Don The Dragon Wilson isn't kicking ass, he's kicking vampire ass! That is if you count this week's movie: Night Hunter! This film takes everything you know about vampires and then throws it out the window. A new breed of convenient day time walking, wood stake immune, vampires are walking the streets of Los Angeles and Don Wilson needs to Kung Fu them to death before the eclipse for some reason that isn't perfectly clear. Grab a glass of celebrity apprentice Bret Michael's vampire juice headband sweat Snapple and let's pop in the tape!
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Monday Mar 01, 2021
Monday Mar 01, 2021
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When you want an 80s schlockfest/gross-out video but can't find Street Trash, that's when you take a detour down to Slime City! Join the VHS Bandits for some all-natural Himalayan yogurt that's so good you'd kill for more. Just like the main character of this movie, you too could grow a mouth in your belly and spew goo like it's going out of style. All you have to do is get possessed by a suicide cult ghost and bada-bingo you're a resident of Slime City. Plan your vacation today!
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Monday Feb 15, 2021
Monday Feb 15, 2021
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Forget Mortal Kombat, forget Tomb Raider, forget Resident Evil, because we're bringing you a classic 90s video game turned movie that will kick their asses: Street Fighter! Who of you knew that there was a plot to the game to make a movie out of? Who cares! Where we're going, we don't need plots. We just need Raul Julia flying around and shooting lighting out of his hands at Jean-Claude Van Damme, and we have it with this movie! Grab a big ol' mason jar full of artisan wee-wee and pop in Street Fighter for maximum Van Damage!
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Monday Feb 01, 2021
Monday Feb 01, 2021
60 minutes of bare naked long butt babes from 1993 riding jet skis, awkwardly sprinkling beach sand on their stomachs and splashing water around while mustached perverts ogle them. This is the 1993 masterpiece Jet Sport Girls from Let's Party Home Video! Want to know anything about the big jet ski competition going on at the beach? Forget it, because Jet Sport Girls just glazes over it. Did I mention the soundtrack is awesome, and the post credit trailers for other titillating Let's Party Home Video cassettes are the best part of the tape.
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Monday Jan 18, 2021
Monday Jan 18, 2021
A martial arts Motown kung fu master with a big fat bone daddy for Bruce Lee in search of enlightenment. A psychotic entertainment producer willing to do anything for his Cindy Lauper ripoff girlfriend to get one music video to air in a New York dance club. A narcissistic gang leader who's the baddest shogun to step foot in Harlem. A fly kid risking it all to win a date with the older woman of his dreams. A father living day by day trying to keep his pizza shop afloat. Plus break dancing, music videos, tons of clips from Bruce Lee movies, a killer soundtrack and front-line-and-center 80's aesthetics. All of this and more are jam packed into our VHS copy of The Last Dragon.
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Monday Jan 04, 2021
Monday Jan 04, 2021
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Gleaming the Cube: the ULTIMATE Skateboard experience. When punk skater Christian Slater's adopted brother is found dead he becomes a clean cut vigilante to find if it was a suicide...or murder. Grab your board, put on those knee pads and dust off your VCR!
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Monday Dec 21, 2020
Monday Dec 21, 2020
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In our Christmas special, this week we adventure into the depths of the Silent Night Deadly Night franchise with the 5th installment, The Toy Maker. Of course, this has nothing to do with the other movies and more to do with a robot Pinocchio, a disgruntled Mickey Rooney, and Larry the Larva. If you haven't finished your shopping just yet, whatever you do, don't buy your toys from Joe Pedo. Now pour yourself a cup of cocoa, cuddle up with the one you love, and pop in Silent Night Deadly Night 5: The Toy Maker! Merry Christmas!!!
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Monday Dec 07, 2020
Monday Dec 07, 2020
Winter is here! And what's the best part of winter? Why, it's taking a snow day off from school! Anything can happen on a snow day. You could fall in love with the girl of your dreams. You could defeat an evil snowplow villain. You could watch the wrong movie and think that you're living through the 5th installment of Silent Night Deadly Night. The possibilities are endless! What will happen on this snow day... Let's pop in the tape and find out!
Monday Nov 23, 2020
Monday Nov 23, 2020
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In the near future of 2007, Los Angeles has become a shit-hole nightmarish wasteland, much like today, except with more robots. Those robots make up the elite law enforcement brigade of T-Force! But when the law turns their back on T-Force; they turn their guns on the law. Except for one who stays a good guy and teams up with hard-boiled robot-hating cop Jack Something-Or-Other. Who will rule the streets? Pop in the tape and find out with T-Force!
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Monday Nov 09, 2020
Monday Nov 09, 2020
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Haven't you always wanted to be kidnapped by Tom Arnold on your way to school? No... well too bad because we watched Carpool! Not only will he kidnap children and endanger the lives of anyone and everyone who gets in his way he'll also kidnap your funny bone and endanger your heart. Join us for the feel-good family crime movie of 1996. Don't be late!
As mentioned check out Corey's awesome new book on VHS collecting: http://bit.ly/VHScollecting
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Monday Oct 26, 2020
Monday Oct 26, 2020
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This week we watch a newer tape that hearkens back to a time of rummaging through the boxes of VHS in your parents basement and stumbling upon a recorded off TV Halloween special. Complete with fake local commercials, this broadcast follows a small town news reporter investigating a supposed haunted house on Halloween night. Take a trip back in time with us and pop in WNUF Halloween Special!
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Monday Oct 12, 2020
Monday Oct 12, 2020
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Happy Halloween, bandits! It's that time of year again, time to get scared silly with Ronald McDonald; and we don't mean the juicy squirts from too many McNuggets. Join Ronald and the gang in this late 90s animated adventure in the style of "Rocket Power". Ron McDon and his suicidal dog adventure off into the woods with their friends on a camping trip but get scared silly upon entering a haunted mansion!
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Monday Sep 21, 2020
Monday Sep 21, 2020
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Grab your space-backpack and space-belt because we're taking a trip with Vitsie the video sitter... to space! And boy is it a trip. This video was made as a babysitter substitute for deadbeat parents who were sick of their whining kids and wished that they could blast them off into out space and spend a romantic evening by themselves at the Moon Motel in a coin-operated anti-gravity bed. Back in the day, Vitsie made that wish come true, for 30 or so minutes anyway. Who is Vitsie? Well, she is a cracked out cyborg in a mustard robo-suit with glowing eyes, ya know, someone you can really trust with your children. What are we waiting for? Let's blast off!
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Monday Sep 07, 2020
Monday Sep 07, 2020
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Are you tired of living in a stupid, dumb, stupid house? Us too! That's why we went back to the past to see the future of home intelligence by watching the Disney Channel original movie Smart House! Take away the bright colors and goofy sound effects and this movie is a straight-up horror flick. It's basically about a sentient home A.I. that becomes obsessed with its residents and eventually tries to murder everybody that gets in between them, needless to say, its rad! So turn off your virtual assistants, pour a bowl of creme of breakfast pasta soup, and pick up your universal remote because it's time to watch Smart House!
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Monday Aug 24, 2020
Monday Aug 24, 2020
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Monday Aug 10, 2020
Monday Aug 10, 2020
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School is about to be back in session and if you haven't decided in a major yet why not enroll yourself into Buster Burger University to become a proud Buster Burger store manager! Of course you'll have to refrain from having sex with your classmates because there has to be some sort of thin plot line to string the semesters together. Oh, and you'll also want to avoid the pickle shaped iron maidens, being turned into a human chicken, angry biker gangs, and Dick Butkus.
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Monday Jul 27, 2020
Monday Jul 27, 2020
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This week we bring you one of Dane Train's favorite movies (spoiler: not one of KevBot's favorite movies) The Misery Brothers Y2K! What the heck is this movie? Great question, we're not sure the writers even knew. However, it does have a star-studded cast including Lou Ferrigno, Abe Vigoda, Roddy Piper, Erik Estrada as an Elvis impersonator, and a bunch of other actors who presumably owed someone a favor. This movie has it all, musical numbers, mafiosos in drag, flying plastic babies, goofball Italian goons, and lots of inexplicable chickens. If that doesn't sell you on this flick I don't know what will. So sit back, don't ask too many questions, and pop in The Misery Brothers Y2K!
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Monday Jul 13, 2020
Monday Jul 13, 2020
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It's officially time for summer blockbusters! But we watched Deep Rising instead. For this episode, we are joined by the ultra talented filmmaker and podcaster, from Guaranteed Audio, Kevin James! Luckily for us, Kevin happens to be the official VHS Bandits Deep Rising expert.
If you think watching Harrison Ford kick some aquatic alien ass on a cruise ship sounds awesome then you're in for a treat! Treat Williams that is, because Harrison Ford isn't in this movie. But hey, Dead Heat rules so there's that. With a plot that has about as many holes as the sinking ship, it takes place on Deep Rising will keep you on the edge of your crap-trap until you're sucked in by a toilet tremor!
Check out all of Kevin's work and more that we mention in the episode because, seriously, everything this dude makes is gold and right up any VHS Bandit's alley.
Kevin's latest video game documentary "Not for Resale" is available now and a must for physical media lovers like us! "Not For Resale examines the sea change in video gaming from physical media to the digitally distributed future, featuring interviews with store owners, game developers, journalists, and preservationists about what lies ahead for the world of physical media and how it affects more than just video games."
Check it out: www.gamestoredoc.com
Follow Kevin James on Twitter: @KevinTheJames
Check out Kevin's other work: www.kevinthejames.com
...
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Monday Jun 29, 2020
Monday Jun 29, 2020
Monday Jun 15, 2020
Monday Jun 15, 2020
Little Rubber Monster Month continues and this week, fresh from out the over and flying into your bedroom on an ever evolving pizza, we bring you: Munchie! As children, wasn't it all of our dream to have our very own personal creepy and deformed Dom DeLuise in a leather jacket to do monkey paw magic for us? The wait is over... a couple decades ago, because Jim Wynorski blessed the world with this film. Who knows, maybe next time you're exploring the bottom of a bottomless pit you too could stumble upon your very own Munchie!
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Monday Jun 01, 2020
Monday Jun 01, 2020
It's Little Rubber Monster Month here at the VHS Bandits and we're kicking it off Full Moon style with Ghoulies 2! When a crumby carnival is being Electric Boogalooed by it's corporate fat cat owner it's up the alcoholic spook house carnie and his protege to make enough money to save the show. Good thing they have just what the people want to see: Ghoulies! But, it's too bad that the Ghoulies start to kill everybody...
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Monday May 18, 2020
Monday May 18, 2020
Lorenzo Lamas month continues with the action-packed, karate basement, 5-star restaurant, secret laboratory, all-inclusive prison timeshare having CIA Code Name: Alexa! This movie also stars future murderer (allegedly) OJ Simpson. Not to mention one of the best movie scores we've heard in a long time, if not ever. Dust off that VCR and mute your Echo speakers because its time to pop in CIA Code Name: Alexa!
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Monday May 04, 2020
Monday May 04, 2020
It's Lorenzo Lamas month here on the podcast and we're kicking it off with a very special episode. This marks our 101 regular episode milestone! Our very first episode was "SnakeEater 2: The Drug Buster" and if it weren't for this series of films this show may have never existed. That movie was just too good not to do a podcast on. Along the way, we also covered "SnakeEater 3: His Law" and now we bring it around full circle, like a snake eating its own tail, with the original SnakeEater! Soldier Kelly must rescue his sister from a band of backwoods kidnappers. Will he be able to take them on? Of course, he will! He's Lorenzo Lamas! So pop in the tape, hop on your boatercycle, and prepare for action!
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Monday Apr 20, 2020
Monday Apr 20, 2020
Monkey month continues with another ape playing sports movie, brought to you by the people who gave you dog playing sports movie! This time the monkey is real and not some guy in a suit. While watching this we asked ourselves "Has a good monkey playing sports movie ever been made?". After watching we unanimously agreed that NO it has not. If you hated "Ed" You'll really hate "MVP"!
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Monday Apr 06, 2020
Monday Apr 06, 2020
It's officially Monkey Month and we're opening the season with the Matt LeBlanc vehicle "Ed". A monkey joining a minor league baseball team was the perfect pitch for the studios to greenlight funding. That pitch being a bunch of 90s jumbled together ideas for a cash grab kids movie. Sitcom star to pull in the parents: check. Guy in a monkey suit: check. Fart jokes: check. America's favorite pastime: check. A plot replaced by a series of random events: check. Rewind your tapes and wind up your pitching arm for Ed!
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Sunday Mar 22, 2020
Sunday Mar 22, 2020
There's a global pandemic going on but don't worry, the VHS Bandits are on the case. We found the one medical professional certain to put an end to it all: Dr. Giggles! Join us for the second installment of Occupational Horror month with this 1992 medical marvel. For all of you in quarantine right now you're in luck because the good doctor makes house calls, it's just too bad that the doctor is out... of his mind!
Join our Patreon for extra episodes and VHS goodness! Patreon.com/VHSbandits
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Monday Mar 09, 2020
Monday Mar 09, 2020
This week we watched The Carpenter! Ever wonder what it'd be like to see Al Borland go ape shit and kill a bunch of people? Then go watch "Poolboy 2: Drowning out the Fury" because he does that, or you could just watch this movie and drink enough Diet Juicy Squirt until Wings Hauser looks enough like Richard Karn to satisfy your darkest fantasies. Much like most things we watch this film makes little to no sense but we do our best to break down the complexities of it's fine film making craftsmanship. Also consider checking out our ShitStarter Campaign for Shit-Bit the personal dookie tracker!
Join our brand new Patreon for extra episodes and VHS goodness! Patreon.com/VHSbandits
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Sunday Feb 23, 2020
Sunday Feb 23, 2020
The Bandits are back to the future with more FUTURE MONTH and this time it's the year 3000 where "In Space There Is No Daylight"...or a plot, or a story that goes anywhere, or decent sets, or costumes, or actors, or props, or a script or a decent ending. In DRACULA.3000 (because there has to be a "." in there since it's the future??) Casper Van Dien, Coolio and Tiny Lister battle a Halloween store costumed vampire...IN SPACE!
Join our brand new Patreon for extra episodes and VHS goodness! Patreon.com/VHSbandits
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